Some more “ACTUAL INTERNET POSTINGS that we decided not to read”:

     “San Francisco Cityscape Sculpted from Stainless Steel Cookware”
      “Top Ten Crazy Asian Pizza Crusts”
      “Woman Suffers From Disease That Causes Fish Odor”
       “4 Things in Your House Dirtier Than A Toilet”
      “Memory Loss Linked to Short Arms and Legs”
      “How People Sleep Under Their Desks at Work”
      “Pabst Blue Ribbon Casket”
      “Hilarious & Clever Panhandling Signs”
      “The 11 Best Songs from Geek-Movie Soundtracks”
      “The Poison Ivy Cure... and 9 other Weird Uses for Vodka”
      “How to Put Your Jeans On”
      “Funny Shaped Japanese Watermelons”
      “Strange carpet store names can floor you”
       and
      “Make Stylish Compost in Your Kitchen”